Trying something new can be scary, including your first kiss! If you feel ready to let your lips do the talking but can't conquer the pit of worry in your stomach, you've come to the right place. Learn how to conquer your first kiss fears by getting the lowdown on everything you can expect.
Common First Kiss Fears
If you're having some anxiety about how to have your first kiss, you aren't alone. Everyone has some fear when it comes time to pucker up for the first time. What do most people worry about when it comes to how to get your first kiss?
- Will they think I'm a good kisser? I don't know how to have a good first kiss.
- What if it's unexpected and my breath smells bad?
- I've never kissed anyone. I don't even know what to do.
- How will I know they want to kiss me?
- What if we bump heads? Which way do I turn my head? I don't know what to do on a first kiss.
- Do I use my tongue? How much tongue do I use?
- Where do I put my hands?
- How long do I kiss for? How will I know when to stop?
- When do I turn my head during a kiss? Do I turn my head?
It's okay. You won't have to know everything about kissing when you kiss for the first time because guess what? Your first kiss won't be a lusty make-out session.
You will most likely have a five-second (if that) kiss that'll consist of two lips puckered that touch each other with some suction. That's it. You'll release, look into each other's eyes, and think it's magical. Your kissing partner will probably think it's pretty awesome too.
While this may seem pretty simple, that doesn't mean you shouldn't be armed with some tips for first kisses before you enter your first kissing experience.
Related: These Zodiac Signs Are the Best Kissers in the Cosmos
What to Expect With (& How to Prep For) Your First Kiss
It's time for some kissing education. While this prepares you to kiss for the first time, the best way to perfect your kissing technique is to do it. Practice makes perfect — so once you know how to kiss, don't be afraid to pucker up when the moment calls for it.
Keep Your Breath Minty Fresh
Have mints or gum on hand at all times. You can easily swallow a mint when you're about to kiss someone. That way, you can be assured that your breath is fresh and clean.
Look for the Right Body Langauge
You'll know someone wants to kiss you when the person looks deeply into your eyes and leans into you. You'll feel it inside you that there's something about to happen. If you start leaning into the person, and he or she doesn't step back or lean back, you know it's time...a special time for a kiss. You may also decide to ask permission to kiss the person if leaning in doesn't feel right.
Practice Kissing Through Imagination
Right now, try it. Imagine kissing the person you think you'll be kissing for the first time. Pay attention to where your hands will go.
Usually, they go on the person's waist, or if you're embracing, in the middle of your partner's back. If you are sitting next to each other, it's okay to hold his or her hand(s), or place a hand on the arm, or upper thigh.
Relax Your Body
Take a deep breath and let it all out, so your body is relaxed. If you are too uptight, your lips will remain tight, and your kissing partner will feel that. Remember, you are figuring out how to do your first kiss so it doesn't need to be perfect.
Slowly Move Into the Kiss
Moving slowly into the kiss will also give you time to prepare you to form your mouth for the kiss. Don't start puckering when you're a foot from the other person. When you're about five inches or so, open your mouth slightly and pucker up a little. It's not exactly a classic pucker when you are romantically kissing, it's more of a loose pucker. This makes how to do a first kiss easy.
To resolve your anxiety about which way to move your head, move in slowly for the kiss. That way, you can watch which way the person you are kissing is moving his or her head, and you can turn the opposite way. See, if you go too quickly, you may go the say way, and then BAM — knocked heads. It will make it more special if you move more slowly too.
Close Your Eyes
Some people don't close their eyes, but some kissing partners are spooked by that. So for the sake of not running off your first kissing partner, just close your eyes when you lock your lips. Someday, if it makes you too uncomfortable to close your eyes, you can take a stand and just keep them open. It's up to your kissing partner to deal with it if he or she doesn't like it.
Try Not to Overcomplicate Things
Good news! For your first kiss, you don't need to turn your head. Actually, when you turn your head, it's really more than one kiss. You're actually releasing a little when you turn your head during a kiss. You kiss, stop a little, turn your head, and continue kissing but that's for another lesson though.
You also don't need to use your tongue. That's for more experienced kissers.
Savor the Moment and Slowly Let Go
Once you lock your lips, savor the moment. You've done it! You are in your first kiss - AH! How awesome is that?
When does it end? No need to count. Just wait a little and then slowly move your head back a little. Your kissing partner will understand that the kissing is over and move his or her head back too.
As you move back, slowly open your eyes, look into the eyes of your kissing partner, and smile.
If you're really feeling the moment, keep up the momentum by sneaking in a quick peck right after you part lips.
Kissing Should Feel Natural
A first kiss can bring with it anxiety as you anticipate it and worry that you might mess it up. Keeping it simple and simply enjoying the moment can help you not worry so much. As mentioned above, if you're wondering how to be a good kisser for your first kiss, the key is to not try to get too fancy with the kiss.
In fact, the best tips for your first kiss are to forget everything you've seen in the movies and to concentrate on the connection of the lips — that's a kiss. Opening your mouth, shoving your tongue in the other person's mouth, or moaning loudly will likely just make the other person uncomfortable (especially if it's their very first kiss too). Your tips for a first kiss shouldn't come from actors on TV as they don't necessarily present realistic scenarios.
Pucker Up — You're Ready for Your First Kiss
If you feel your first kiss on the horizon, don't worry! Knowing what to expect and feeling prepared can ease the anxiety that creeps up from trying something new. So long as you communicate with your partner and you're both enthusiastically consenting to a little lip action, things will be smooth sailing ahead.
