It's the best part of waking up! A cup of Joe can put some pep in your step, but so can a collection of clever coffee jokes. While you may be thinking, bean there, brewed that, we have the perfect blend of coffee puns and jokes that are guaranteed to mocha your day!
Mug-nificent Coffee Jokes to Froth Up Your Morning
For those who love caffeine and a keen wit, we cannot espresso how excited we are to serve up these creative coffee jokes! They are sure to bring a brew-tiful start to your day.
Did you hear that Starbucks filed a police report?
They got mugged!
How does a cup of coffee pay a compliment to his date?
He tells her she looks brew-tiful!
Did you hear that there is a new coffee shop in town?
This news is hot off the French press!
What does a policeman say when he has a coffee bean criminal cornered?
Hands up! You’re under a-roast.
What does a barista say to his lady love?
Everything I brew, I brew for you.
How do you know when a cup of Joe feels under the weather?
He starts coffee and sneezing!
Want to know how Noah makes his coffee on the ark?
Hebrews it!
What did the coffee bean say to the guy who was bullying his brother?
You’re cruising for a brews-ing!
How does a barista greet the day?
He says ‘Rise N Grind!’
Why should you not take everything a barista says seriously?
Sometimes they have no filter!
A Second Serving of Coffee Dad Jokes Is Grounds for Celebration
Looking for more coffee jokes? Brew bet! Mocha room for more laughter because we are serving up a second helping of java jests.
How does a vampire take his coffee?
Decoffinated!
What did the pirate coffee bean say when his ship crashed on a desert island?
We've run aground!
What does a coffee cup say when someone knocks him over when walking by?
Why you gotta be so brewed?!
What happens to a coffee bean that is late for curfew?
He gets grounded!
What kind of coffee did King Louis XVI have right before he was taken to the guillotine?
Decap!
What did Michael Jordan say to a little coffee bean who is scared to take a shot on the basketball court?
Brew-lieve in yourself and just brew it!
What is a toddler coffee bean’s favorite game?
Brewsical chairs!
What does Captain Kirk say when he needs to get his coffee fast?
Bean me up, Scotty!
What do you call a couple of coffee bullies?
Mean beans!
Did you know that a cup of coffee can't attend Hogwarts?
Muggles aren't welcome.
Laudable Latte Jokes That Will Bring a Latte Laughs
If you want to make coffee jokes a part of your daily grind, then you can't be afraid to switch up your order every once and a while! These lighthearted latte jokes are guaranteed to add a bit of sweetness to your morning routine.
Why was the coffee bean stressed?
He had a latte problems!
What’s James Bond’s go-to coffee order?
A pumpkin spy-ced latte!
What Beatles song can you always expect to hear in a coffee shop?
Latte Be!
Why did the coffee get promoted over the energy drink?
He had a latte brewing potential!
Why did the man go to the tea shop before heading to Starbucks for his latte?
Safe tea first, or course!
Did you hear about racoon that drank the latte?
After one sip, he was foaming at the mouth!
What is a teenage coffee bean’s favorite TV show?
Pretty Little Lattes
Where can you always find Texan coffee beans at the end of the week in the fall?
Watching football under the Friday night lattes!
What does a cup of Joe say when he isn't impressed by his new barista?
Latte da!
What does a latte say when he is depressed?
Pour me!
Clever Cappuccino Puns for All Those Cool Beans
A simple cup of Joe won't always do, which means that you may need to elevate your coffee pun order to a cup of cappuccino puns! Here are some of our favorites!
What does a frappuccino say to a cappuccino on his birthday?
Frappe birthday to brew!
What did the cappuccino do at the end of her date with the hot tea?
She went ahead and kissed the chai!
Why should frogs never drink cappuccinos?
Because they make them way too jumpy!
How does a cappuccino say goodbye?
Java nice day!
How does a cup of Joe pass any test at school?
He puts on his thinking cap-puccino!
What is a Cappuccino's favorite fantasy series?
The Lord of the Beans!
Why was the woman mad when she was given a cappuccino?
It was not her cup of tea!
Why should a snake never drink a cappuccino in the afternoon?
It makes them viper-active!
What kind of monkey can you always catch at a coffee bar?
A cappuccino!
What did the cappuccino say when it was having a really bad day?
Listen, I need to venti.
Espresso Coffee Jokes to Rev Up Your Day
A few shots of espresso are sure to get you buzzing, but how about a shot or two of silliness? Sometimes when that midday slump hits, we just need to reboot our mood, and espresso coffee jokes are sure to fill this tall order!
How does Harry Potter prepare his coffee?
By using the Espresso Patronum spell!
What is the best train to buy coffee on?
The Polar Espresso!
Why do baristas make coffee art?
To espresso themselves!
What do you call it when you drop your cup of espresso?
A coffee break!
What kind of coffee can you always expect to give you speedy service?
An espresso, of course!
What do you call a bad cup of espresso?
A depresso!
Did you hear that the milk got in a fight with the espresso?
He got pretty steamed!
What do you call it when someone orders five shots of espresso?
A very tall order!
What did the espresso shot say to the milk in the middle of his busy work day?
Sorry, can’t talk! I have a latte on my plate right now!
What did the shot of espresso say when he ran into the vanilla ice cream and experienced a tartle?
I'm so sorry, affogato your name!
One-Liner Coffee Puns for the True Caffeine Fiends
Looking to start your day with a cup of pun-derful? Well, we are serving up just that! For those fueled by caffeine and puns, check out these captivating coffee puns that are the perfect captions for any post about your favorite morning beverage.
- If you want to embrace your inner Ricky Martin, then you need to start livin’ la vida mocha.
- You can never trust a cup of Joe with your secrets. They will always spill the beans!
- When you get served exceptionally good coffee, it's grounds for a good time!
- According to witches, pumpkin spice lattes are the most fa-brew-lous coffee drinks around!
- Hit me with your best shot! Of espresso, that is!
- Getting in shape is tough — I lift a latte and do at least 25 sip ups every morning!
- I like my coffee like I like my men — tall, dark, and rich.
- I think this coffee tastes like mud. I guess I shouldn't be surprised ... it was ground just a few minutes ago.
- They say that too much caffeine can be bad for you, but I say, the mocha the merrier!
- See you later, percolator!
Coffee Jokes & Puns to Accelerate Your Day
Words cannot espresso how much we appreciate you reading through these coffee jokes! Hopefully, they served up some smiles and steamed up your day in the best way. If you are looking to mocha more inspirational posts, then also check out our coffee quotes. They are sure to brew up some excitement!
